Freddy's Christmas Eve Dance Party: Christmas Shoes Edition!

It's Christmas eve and despite it being such a wonderful time, I get the suspicious feeling that you could use a little pick me up. Some inspiration to do good for your fellow man which will only help you feel whole and give you the sense of poignancy you deserve. I think I know just the right band to do it, and that's NewSong (one word?). When I hear of a band with a name like NewSong, I figure they are one of two things (and maybe even a little bit of both), either a contemporary Christian group sent to the Earth to spread the word of the lord, or a boy band. I'm not sure of the difference, but I am aware that NewSong's song, Christmas Shoes (which is a prequel to their 1999 breakout hit, Easter Dress), makes me stop and realize how important it is to have a hot new pair of kicks.

You see, this video, the lyrics, the clear merchandising message to buy shoes and help the economy, thus ending terrorism, as well as just how pretty it's sung, only makes my heart grow fonder this holiday season. However, it is all slightly soured when I have to look at the disrespectful dude singing this beautiful Christmas song. I mean, spread the good word, brother, but I would appreciate it if you could take what '20 seconds' to put some gel in your hair? It's Christmas, dog, and you're wearing a hat like it's fucking Thanksgiving and shit. Show some respect. I know your standing around uncomfortably with a bunch of your boys and don't wanna look like a chump with a nicely done up hairdo, but that shit went out the door with that 32 foot long red scarf you wore. This isn't This Old House, so get it together if you want to sell me the good word.

You know what, come to think of it, that dude actually looks really familiar…

Sorry man, you get a pass this time. The hat's all yours.