Matt-suzaka Takes Manhattan… and Gives it a Big Old Kiss!

Good morning class of 1989! Hopefully you got your permission slip signed for our big trip to Back Online. Back On Duty., but if not, I’ll probably let you slide if you’re promiscuous enough and have some cocaine. Anyway, the trip should take about an hour, and when we get there. we’ll be spending most of our time on rooftops, in back alleys and down in the sewers, but you guys won’t know the difference, right?!

Okay, now that I’m done being an idiot, I am here to encourage you to take a few minutes out of this lovely Friday the 13th to head over to the OCP approved Back Online. Back On Duty. to check out a piece I did for a brand new segment entitled Back Online. Back On Doodie. The idea behind this segment is simple: guest bloggers are invited to share a film that they once hated, but somehow, someway, have learned to love over the years. I have a number of films that fall under this category (and vice versa), but after much thought and deliberation with my favorite stuffed bear, the one I went with is Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan!

Honestly, I had no idea that Friday the 13th was nearing when I chose to write about Jason Takes Manhattan, but the coincidence is certainly okay by me. Regardless, please take a moment to stop by Back Online. Back On Duty to check out my hate-to-love relationship with Jason Takes Manhattan, then be sure you spend some time checking out all the other goodies that Eric has in store on what is truly one of the best blogs ON THE PLANET!

CLICK DA LINK!!!

Jason's Friday Night Dance Party!

After a full year of dance parties presented by the son of a hundred maniacs, it's about damn time good old Jason got a little love around here, and what better time than on Friday the 13th? The answer is…there is no better time than Friday the 13th to show some respect for one of cinemas finest Slahser veterans, Jason M. Voorhees. Actually, I don't think he has a known middle initial, but it just sounded better. You know, more official. So, whether it be Ari Lehman, Warrington Gillette, Steve Daskawisz, Richard Brooker, Ted White, Tom Morga, C. J. Graham, Dan Bradley, Kane Hodder (!), Ken Kirzinger, Derek Mears or whomever The Man Behind the Mask may be in any given film, Jason is a horror icon that is rivaled by few, and I am happy to dedicate this party to that mongoloid maggot-faced sonuvabitch, on this - his special day.    

Written by Kane Roberts, Tom Kelly and performer Alice Cooper, He's Back (The Man Behind the Mask) appeared on the Constrictor album but is best known as the theme song for 1986's Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives. The song was written as a sort of celebration for the return of Jason Voorhees after his annoying hiatus in A New Beginning, where Jason turned out to not actually be Jason, in a Friday movie that turned out not to be a good Friday movie. So you can guess that Jason's return was worth celebrating. 

Now, we all know that Freddy ruled the roost when it came to awesome music videos and song dedications, but He's Back (The Man Behind the Mask) is as good as anything from the Freddy camp, and it's unfortunate that there weren't a few more quality songs and videos like it for the Friday series. The song is incredibly catchy with an infectious chorus, and the use of ki-ki-ki, ma-ma-ma-ma simply brings a smile to my rotted face, though I am wearing a mask, so you can't tell. It's certainly great that the song is brought to life by Alice Cooper, someone that has always been so heavily influenced by horror and all things wicked in his music and Grand-Guignolesque stage act. Plus, he is Freddy's pops, so there is that whole connection there too.

Anyways, fantastic video, and I hope it starts your Friday spent with Jason films off on the right foot. Enjoy your Friday the 13th everyone, before you lack the blood and innards to do so.  

No Need to Put a Bag Over Paracinema’s Head!

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Freddy VS. Jason 2?

Well, not quite. I did find this incredibly odd video recently and thought that you all would get a kick out of it. It's all in Spanish, but there are subs for anyone with the power of understanding. Whatever, just watch this thing...



Right?! So weird! Like I said, it's Spanish, but they refrained from swearing, so I didn't hear any familiar words. If anyone knows what the hell these dudes are saying, please, enlighten me...I can only imagine so much ya know.

With the off lip syncing, I thought I was watching a Giallo for a moment and I do Love Freddy's gold glove with exposed thumb. Also, why is Jason only wearing one glove? Or a glove at all? And why are his sleeves ripped off? Is this an alternate Jason that Freddy met at the bar from Freddy's Revenge? These are burning questions and I need some answers, now! The beat is pretty dope though.